Submission, Part 2

My wife recently wrote about submission (see below), and I thought I would add some general notes here as well for the men.

Guys, it's clear that in Ephesians 5, Paul writes that we need to love our wives as Christ loved the Church, that He gave Himself up for it. Later, Paul goes on to say that we need to submit to one another, as unto the Lord. What does that mean?

It means that we cannot sit here and "lord" it over our wives. Yes, we are called to be leaders of the house, but not to an oppressive point. It means that we need to be able to communicate with our wives the good, the bad, and the ugly. And it means that we have to make ourselves vulnerable in order to do so. I guess the best way I can illustrate this is by an example:

As a husband, when I cannot provide for my wife, it hurts me so much that it breaks my heart. When I found out that we might not be able to have done what we wanted to do for our anniversary, well, you can imagine how I felt. On top of this, I had to tell her that we were not going to be able to do this. I could have "lorded" it over her and said we are not doing this and that is the end of the discussion. But I didn't (and I'm so thankful that I didn't!). Instead, she was able to tell me that we could, but we'd have to re-arrange some stuff, so it actually ended up working out for the better!

Guess it just goes to show you that when you submit together, you acheive results, and a harmonious marriage. If you try to "lord" it over your wife, the results are devastating to say the least.